Relationships – Reality check

We check our physical health regularly. We ensure that it is up to the mark. What about mental health? Does it matter?

It matters. Our thoughts define our speech. Our speech defines our actions. Our actions define our achievements.

Our mental health defines our achievements. Our mental health is greatly governed by the quality of our relationships. Therefore it is important to regularly monitor the quality of our relationships.

How to check quality of our relationships?

In a relationship what is in our influence? Our contribution, our actions and our attitude. Relationships are reciprocal. If we contribute well, we also receive accordingly.

If we just focus on what we are getting rather than what we are giving, we will be met with frustration.

The more we focus on selfish gain, our relationships get strained and our world contracts. The more focus on selfless contribution, our relationships improve and our world expands.

We need to focus on our responsibilities not on our rights. If we just focus on rights than either we hurt ourselves or hurt others.

It is like expecting high returns without proper investment. Our happiness is defined by the quality of our relationships i.e. connections. (Bhagavad Gita – 2.66)

Therefore our quality of relationships is determined by our contribution, sense of responsibility in relationships.

How to improve quality of relationships? 

The things of this world appeal to our senses but not to our heart. The wealth of our heart is in giving not taking. Keeping disproportionate focus on acquiring things of this world will be a distraction in our relationships. (Bhagavad Gita – 2.44)

We need to acquire things of this world to fulfil our basic needs. But they cannot ultimately make us happy.

Here in the above story, we see that the two queens of Pandu – Kunti and Madri preferred to remain chaste to their husband than to royal comforts.


To the degree we are selfless and responsible in our relationships, we will be happy. Regularly monitoring the quality of our relationships is a vital aspect of our life.